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Revenge of the Nerds -- Part 1
When Betty Wheeler stepped
onto the stage of the newly named Betty Wheeler Auditorium she heard a
click as she prepared to deliver a presentation featuring 300 pictures of Metro
students. Without warning, however, the slide
presentation abruptly ended after ten pictures.
“I’m just glad they showed that
beautiful picture of me," Cynthia Price beamed.
"I look just as good today as I did
then."
True to form, Betty made a graceful exit and only a handful of the
audience knew the slide show had been cut short.
“The Board spent $8 million on
this building, this is not supposed to happen,” Betty shared with the Metro Times the next day. “I knew it had nothing to do with the
building,” she bristled.
“After ten
pictures,” Rose Williams said to the Metro Times the next day,
“the computer gave out and none of the other pictures appeared. I’m not sure what happened but they say
the laptop didn’t have the necessary memory to handle 300 pictures.”
“A different
computer was set up in the library after the ceremony,” Rose added, “and that
went off without a hitch.” By then,
however, the damage was done. A
very limited audience, if anyone, saw the slide presentation.
After receiving a
tip, the Metro Times launched an all out investigation into the 290
missing slides. The Metro
Times enlisted the help of psychologist Tanya Caldwell (1974) in
its efforts. “I am sad to say that
after 30 years, intrigue and mystery have not ended. Whenever you have people, something like this will happen,”
Caldwell explained, “It’s like Shakespeare: You can come back 100 years from now
and it will still be relevant because human emotions never change.”
Sources tell the
Metro Times that as many as three individuals may have been behind a
possible plot to rig Betty’s slide presentation.
Through a series of interviews and wiretaps, the Metro Times has unraveled
what could be considered the biggest high school prank since Schoenle-Burns. In psychological terms, Caldwell calls
what happened a “duopolistic inversion.”
Shortly after the
ceremony, school security, under pressure from Superintendent Hammonds
and Board President Brewster (who himself hoped to see pictures of his
daughter, Paula, during the presentation), quickly named a current Metro
student as their initial suspect.
Under hypnosis, the student reportedly noticed a man with a moustache near the
projection equipment. This was the
first break in the case. School
officials working undercover at Harrah’s Saturday night attempted to locate the
mustached man.
They briefly
questioned
Steve Hinchcliff about his whereabouts and his activities Friday morning.
While acknowledging his presence at the auditorium ceremony, Hinchcliff
reportedly stated “I did not have a moustache thirty years ago and I have none
tonight.” The Metro student could not identify
Hinchcliff as the culprit saying only, "The man I saw had a moustache and Mr.
Hinchcliff doesn’t have one."
Authorities also
questioned Theo Johnson after seeing him with CDs and tapes in hopes of
finding the pictures on CD. Johnson
was quickly cleared and the School’s investigation quickly came to dead-end. In the interim, school security
interviewed Sherry Wheeler who mysteriously disappeared after the
ceremony. In search of additional clues, the
school confiscated a video tape Sherry made of the ceremony. "We will leave no stone unturned in our
investigation,” the Board’s head of security reported.
Conducting its
own investigation, the Metro Times has concluded that the
plot to conceal the pictures began two weeks ago when high school opera diva,
Pamela Burton was tipped off that certain operatic pictures of her were
planned to be shown during the dedication.
Now an actress, Pam and her agent were concerned that nerdy opera pictures would
conflict with Pam’s grown-up image of today.
When Pam’s agent failed to circumvent the school’s security system they
turned quickly to plan B, which involved meeting at the home of Steve Hinchcliff
and the possible recruitment of Hinchcliff in the scheme. To find Hinchcliff’s residence, Burton
and her agent commandeered a St. Louis Emergency Medical Services vehicle
help them in their search.
"It may
not be generally known, but EMS vans have access to every name and address, as
part of their emergency response system.
An EMS truck can track the address of every person in any given area. It has information, you won’t find even
in the white pages,”
Jackie Gladney, a member of the reunion committee stated.
“I thought it was
a bit odd to find Pam at this particular meeting,” another committee member
noted, “We had been trying to find Pam Burton for six months and then, all of a
sudden, there she was. It was like
a miracle.” Determined to maintain
her sultry new image, the Metro Times believes Burton joined
the Committee and sat close to Betty to make sure the plan she and her
compatriots hatched succeeded.
Did Hinchcliff
also have a motive? He was
overheard saying to Sylvester Holmes, “Sy, like you, I hit my growth
after high school. I don’t want
them showing nerdy pictures any more than you do.
You already told them we were nerds in high school, they don’t need to SEE it,
too. What will our wife and kids
say? We got to get rid of those
pictures and fast.”
Meanwhile,
Daryl Mitchell and Lisa Cole-Collier were not amused about the
missing pictures. "I was looking
forward to the slide show. Kathy
Blanks was my prom date and Lisa Cole was queen,” Mitchell stated. ”There were pictures there of the prom and of the coronation,
said Lisa Cole-Collier, the Queen of the class of 1974. There were pictures there that not even
Renegade has seen. I don’t think
its right to be denied these really great pictures.”
And apparently neither does Charles Mitchell.
The Metro
Times intercepted the following conversation between Charles and Kevin
Mitchell:
Charles: Kevin, I realize Steve Hinchcliff is
your boy and what happened was hard on you, too.
Your love for Betty is just as strong as any of us. You expressed that very well at the
reunion. So if you decide to take more drastic
measures, we’ll understand. But
with Hinchcliff being your boy and all - if you decide to give him and Pam a
pass on this one, no one will question your decision.
You’re the captain. It’s up
to you.
Kevin: My wife, Linda, would be very
upset if anything happened. You
know, Steve played guitar for the church and he promised to perform for the
dedication of the new church. And
Pam and the wife, they go back.
Charles: At the
same time, matters such as these cannot be taken lightly. It was an insult to all of us in the
Metro family. Those pictures held
so many memories for so many people.
There were pictures of people who have passed on.
We would have found both sadness and joy.
Life has its ups and its downs and always there is a price to pay, but you, Kev,
you do what you feel is right in your heart.
That’s why I made you captain.
If you decide to give a pass on this one, no one will question your
decision. You are the captain. You decide.
You make the decision. You
do what’s in your heart.
. . . To be continued?
Filed
03-June-2002, Written by Sylvester Holmes
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